The pastor of all Russian people blessed the spiritual guidance. Who is a spiritual guide? How Your Spirit Guides Can Help You

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Sometimes in a person's life there are situations when it is necessary to ask for advice or ask for help to solve a problem, but he does not know who to turn to. In Rus', in the Orthodox faith, there were sacred ministers of the church, who were chosen as spiritual mentors. You can learn how to find a spiritual father in the Orthodox Church from this article.

A spiritual mentor is a sacred minister who has great life and spiritual experience. He teaches religious obedience.

In the history of Orthodoxy, there are main options for mentoring:

• parish priest;
• elders are healers of the human soul, these are future saints.

The elders took a vow of humility and by their actions and deeds alleviated the fate of people lost in doubts. With conversations and parting words, they healed the soul, gave peace and tranquility. They helped in the religious enlightenment of students, taught to comprehend wisdom and contributed to the improvement of the believing person, directed to the righteous path.

Choosing a Spiritual Guide

How to choose a spiritual father will not be a problem, you need to trust your intuition, it will tell you. Understanding will come by itself if communication with a mentor:

• with instructions and conversations, heals the soul;
• brings a sense of relief, joy and peace;
• gives a sense of faith in prayer.

In any sphere of life, sports, labor, a person has a teacher. He helps, shares experience, suggests. The duty of a spiritual mentor is to strengthen the disciple in faith, improve spiritual self-awareness, and fulfill the commandments. In order for God to tell you where to find such a person, it is necessary to pray for the spiritual father to the Lord.

The search should begin with the parish where the priest conducts services and take a closer look at him. Attend a church to which the soul lies. A good priest always has a favorable atmosphere. It is also worth talking with the parishioners of the temple and get their opinion. You should not immediately call the first minister of the church a mentor. Talking with other people, find out which priest has authority. Usually people are afraid to entrust the most intimate and it is difficult for them to open up right away. From a conversation with the priest, you can immediately understand whether you can trust him or not. Because the confessor becomes a close person and he needs to confess and share about the sore.

How to become a spiritual father

The mentor is not just walking by, he is a sacred minister and must observe the sacrament of repentance and help to introduce the moral qualities of the Holy Scriptures. A spiritual father should be able to gently and in an intelligible form explain in what ways life concepts do not correspond to Scripture. The job of a mentor is much broader. This is when a sacred minister, through the Holy Spirit, comprehends the soul of a disciple both in words and deeds, by personal example, simplicity and modesty achieves more.

When a student sees a true example of spirituality, he will choose him as a father. The mentor must also be aware that the world around is changing and posing other problems not according to principles, but according to new content. This applies to the Internet and television.

Why ask for blessings

- This is a special prayer, the content of which depends on the person asking. Believers devote any action in life to God in order to become closer.

In addition, the sacred minister, giving a blessing, takes full responsibility. Therefore, the asker needs to indicate the true reason in order to establish a trusting relationship. Then the priest will be able to understand why the blessing is necessary. After all, goals are different.

The Lord is always with you!

There have already been several letters with requests and questions about Spiritual Guidance. Many who are looking for a path, purpose, themselves in this life need a Spiritual Mentor, and it is good when people understand this and strive to find such a person. But it’s bad that sometimes, those who initially have bright motives, impulses and aspirations, to know the truth and become better, come across “unfortunate mentors” who lead people into dead ends, knead the vinaigrette in their heads, which ultimately forms a negative for spiritual development and often ends very sadly. Therefore, it is very important to be able to distinguish people, to understand who can be considered a good Spiritual Mentor, and who is not. What we will try to analyze in this article.

Spiritual Guide and other types of help

A spiritual mentor is one of the important roles and types of assistance to a person in his development, solving problems and achieving his life goals. But the role of a Spiritual Guide is very different from other similar professionals and roles.

The role of the Spiritual Mentor is of course less significant than the role of the Spiritual Teacher in a person's life, but more significant than the role of the Healer, Family Psychologist or Coach.

A Spiritual Teacher is the maximum influence on a person, his development and destiny. But a Spiritual Teacher is a very high spiritual, energetic and intellectual status, it is, first of all, a high level of the Soul, and there are very few such people - real Spiritual Teachers - on Earth.

And there are many more of those who can be good Spiritual Guides, but they also do not lie on the road, and they also need to be looked for. And if the Spiritual Teacher, by his status, right and power of influence, can lead thousands and millions of people along the path of development at the same time, then the Spiritual Mentor can lead tens and hundreds of people.

The difference between a Spiritual Mentor and a healer, coach and psychologist (C.K.P.):

Spiritual Mentor - leads a person, his Soul along the path of development(helps her climb up with dignity) and helps to find answers to many questions, primarily spiritual ones. A healer, psychologist or coach (C.K.P.) - as a rule, they help a person solve individual issues or problems and do not influence the fate of a person as completely as a Spiritual Mentor.

The responsibility of the Spiritual Mentor is an order of magnitude higher than that of the C.K.P. The latter, very often, do not take any responsibility at all: what a person understood during a consultation is his, how he will apply it in life and what results he will get is completely his responsibility and problem. Although for the sake of fairness it must be said that there are exceptions, when, for example, the role of a coach, healer or psychologist is partially combined with the role of a Spiritual Mentor, then everything is different.

The priorities are also different. When, for example, a coach or a psychologist works, the end result is very important, it can be a solved problem or an achieved goal. And the purity of methods and motives may not be considered at all. That is, questions of moral and moral purity often fade into the background, and are not fundamental. A good Spiritual Mentor will always try to follow the Light Path himself and will strive to help others to become on the Light, that is, the moral, that is, the Spiritual Path. That's why he is a Spiritual Mentor.

The goals of the Spiritual Guide are much higher and more complex than in most cases the goals of the C.K.P. Ideally, the goals of the Spiritual Mentor are: the spiritual development of a person, changing and shaping his worldview based on spiritual Knowledge, teaching the difference between Good and Evil, helping a person choose the Light Path, help a person become Worthy and bring his Soul as close as possible to God. As you hopefully understand, such goals are not achieved in one or even ten sessions or consultations.

For deeper understanding read:

Who, in my opinion, should not be called Spiritual Guides

1. The one who himself does not distinguish between Good and Evil, therefore, obviously does not follow the Path of Light himself, and accordingly cannot lead other people along it. We do not consider mentorship in the gray and dark hierarchies. If we're talking about Spiritual Mentoring, then we assume precisely the Light Path, the Path of Good. Because the basis of Spirituality is the ability to clearly distinguish between Good and Evil, although many do not think so.

To understand these questions, read:

Continuing the topic, I can say that I will never consider a Spiritual Mentor a person who does not follow moral principles, that is, who is dishonest, can lie, cheat, betray, steal, act and behave irresponsibly, unworthily and meanly.

2. The one who himself did not become a Worthy Person due to spiritual work on himself cannot be called a good Mentor. If a psychologist or a coach can be anyone in life, that is, their personal life does not concern you, then the Spiritual Mentor should always strive to be a worthy example for his students.

3. What also follows from point 2 is that there cannot be a Spiritual Mentor without significant practical results in life. If a person has read a lot of literature and knows and understands a lot, this does not make him a Spiritual Mentor. As Gennady Khazanov said - “Theory differs from practice in that it has nothing in common with it :)”.

4. A fanatic and an absolutely categorical person, who is not able to calmly, without hysteria and negativity, accept someone else's point of view that does not coincide with his views, cannot be a good Spiritual Mentor. Still, the Spiritual Mentor is already a certain and not a small degree of wisdom, which means the absence of fanaticism, pride and radical condemnation of dissent.

A good Spiritual Guide is (criteria):

1. A deep distinction between Good and Evil, and in everything the choice of the Light Path (a choice confirmed by the dignity of one's own life).
2. The Spiritual Mentor - first of all helps to go along, and therefore everything else: personal life, self-realization, money, health, etc.
3. This is a person who can be a good example for others (not a shameful example).
4. A person who has significant practical achievements in life, in spiritual development and helping people. And this means that he not only absorbed spiritual Knowledge, but also mastered development techniques, applied them to his life and achieved success.
5. A person who is head and shoulders above most other people goes a few steps ahead on the path of development, and this is always felt by how open his soul is, how interesting and rich his inner world is.
6. Also important are the universal qualities: Calmness and the absence of negative reactions are an indicator of Wisdom, Joy in the heart and a smile on the face are an indicator of Light, the strength of the Spirit is an indicator of experience and worthily passed tests in the past.

The Spiritual Mentor is not the ideal of perfection in everything, and he does not have to be perfect or holy, he makes mistakes, like other people. But it can be a conductor of necessary pure Knowledge for you and a good assistant in solving many life problems!

If you decide for yourself that you need a Spiritual Mentor for the development and achievement of your goals - about it.

You can learn more about the topics and rules for working with a Spiritual Mentor on the page -.

Dedicated to all Teachers of the past, present and future. Guru is an ocean of knowledge. In this ocean, one student chooses stones and the other pearls, and this choice depends on the student. Shiva Purana

Every person asks this question sooner or later. Where to begin? Where to go? What to believe? What to do? How to find someone who will tell you how to live right?

There are ranks, castes, classes, titles and other rubbish invented by man to maintain his own ego. Everyone wants proof of their uniqueness, uniqueness. And just like students want to understand that they deserve to be chosen, so Teachers want to be recognized…

In fact, the questions of where and how to find a spiritual teacher are more likely to be in the category of idle ones. Because the one who asks such a question is not looking for a Teacher. He is looking for someone who will develop it instead of him, almost like in that cartoon: “- Are you going to chew for me? “Yeah!”

We all come to Earth to learn and experience. We are all students. Absolutely each of us gains experience based on our own lessons or the lessons of others.

But the whole paradox is that teachers cannot be found. He comes by himself when you are ready for it. However, this does not mean that one should sit and wait and do nothing. One must seek, one must strive, one must understand that life without a spiritual master is empty. And that it is given by fate, by God. That is, if you accept the instructions of those who are already close to you, then your training has already begun.!

And there is a certain sequence in it:

Stage 1. Ignorance. A person is instructed by… enemies. These are the neighbors with whom he has been fighting for many years, this is his mother-in-law, this is his boss, who wants him to work and stop drinking - in a word, all those people who demand something from him. And in a tough, uncompromising form. In this way they explain the truth to him. It is very difficult to accept this truth. Therefore, people in ignorance usually do not know what the truth is.

Stage 2. Passion. Once life forces, and a person is ready to admit the truth and do the right thing. The truth is always a bitter drink, like a medicine. And a person who strives for pleasures (namely, such are the people of passion and ignorance) hardly accepts it. The truth is always hard. But once accepted, it gets easier. He follows it, solves the problem, but then again loses the level.

There is one anecdote about this: a person flies from the 9th floor and thinks: “Lord, I will do everything that you say, I will give everything, just save me!” On the second floor, he catches on the ropes on the balcony, does not reach the ground. Hangs and thinks: “Uff, well, stupid thoughts come to mind sometimes!” That is, a person of passion receives some kind of knowledge, follows it, but when everything becomes good, he immediately relaxes and forgets about it. Such, alas, are 70% of my querents.) - they decided their question, why bother further? And a year later, they have some other nonsense going on, which is actually the same, only in profile.)

Stage 3. Goodness. A man of goodness receives instruction by seeking it. He looks for them, and begins to see them everywhere. The more developed a person is, the more he receives knowledge simply from everything around. The world begins to speak to him. But such people are rare. It is always very difficult for an ordinary person to even simply accept advice. He must first find himself a person whom he can listen to without resistance at all. This is the first stage of contact with the future spiritual teacher. Then, when he learns to listen, he begins to study different directions, beliefs, look for his own path.

When the student is ready, the teacher comes. ancient wisdom

In every human cell there is God. Every human cell is capable of feeling... There are no insensitive people, there are people with undeveloped feelings.

First of all, intuition. Learn to listen to yourself, learn to listen to your inner voice. Everything that concerns the path of spiritual development is very individual. Do not listen to anyone's advice, do not connect your head, listen to your heart.

You can miss your readiness, the teacher will come, and you will pass by and waste time. We have only three attempts to do anything in this life. If you miss all three, don't even try, this time it won't work, but it will definitely work another time - in another life or in another dimension. And in general, everything that should happen to us will definitely happen, but not necessarily in this life. So you will have to prepare in any case and in any case yourself.

A little more about the readiness of the student. What exactly should the student be ready for? The student must be ready to start a new life: face the truth, give up bad habits and unnecessary connections, and most importantly, be ready to follow the instructions of the teacher, even if they do not correspond to today's worldview of the student. Only in this case there will be a result. Doing only what is easy to do or doing halfway does not lead to results.

They say be careful in choosing a mentor. I would add: "Masters, be careful in your choice of disciples." Mistakes of both lead to disastrous results. There must be trust between mentor and student. If you do not trust a mentor, then he is not right for you. If the mentor does not trust the student, then this is not his student.

In addition to earthly mentors, there are teachers and mentors from the subtle worlds. Whether you see them or not, once you have embarked on the path of spiritual development, you have them, and they work with you. The subtle world is much closer today than before. The physical senses of a person tend to become thinner, that is, to approach a subtle state, which means they interact with the subtle world. In addition, the strongest flow of cosmic energies is coming to Earth. Therefore, if a person has a conscious desire to develop spiritually, then it is not at all difficult for him to see and hear his highest teacher or mentor, it is much more difficult to follow their instructions. This is what you need to prepare yourself for and this is what you need to learn.

You can learn on your own - the path of self-knowledge, self-development and self-improvement is open to everyone. If you are looking for an earthly mentor, then it is very important that he has a connection with your mentor, whether a teacher from the subtle world.

The trouble with people is their lack of sanity: when they meet a true disinterested Teacher, they do not trust him and at the same time follow the first person they meet, who throws dust in their eyes, posing as a Teacher. In fact, a true Teacher will never tell you that he is a Teacher, he will let you feel and understand it yourself, he is in no hurry to be recognized. Conversely, the false Master, as soon as he claims to be the Master, becomes obsessed with only one idea: to impose himself on others.

False Gurus think they are able to lead others without having first acquired the necessary qualities: wisdom, love, purity, strength, selflessness. But no…. until the order is received from a higher being to take on such a heavy task of leading people, it is very dangerous to play this role. How many so-called occultists have not the slightest idea of ​​the laws of the spiritual world!

I assure you that they have read some books and, having no preparation, they want to impress the students by performing miracles for them. But it doesn't work like that.

You can't choose a teacher before you choose a faith

Faith must be chosen by getting to know believers. It is necessary to study faith through people, that is, go to different churches, communicate with believers and listen to your heart. Faith is chosen through the heart, through the inner feeling: “this is mine!” Gradually, a person finds some direction of spiritual practice. And when this happens, it is not a spiritual teacher who comes into his life, but a mentor who tells him: “You have to do this.” He thinks - oh-oh, no, this is hard. And then he sees that there is no way out, and he must do it anyway, and begins to follow the instructions. And only after that, after some time, necessary for a certain level of awareness and development, God gives him a spiritual teacher.

What is a spiritual master?

A student who has gained experience, who has learned to pass it on to others, is usually called a Teacher in our world. But the Teacher is the same Student, because he learns to transfer the accumulated knowledge and at the same time perceives the experience of his Students. In fact, he is the same student. And in this case, his disciples are teachers for him.

This is a very strong personality, completely aspiring to God. In Sanskrit, it is called "guru" - heavy. Since the knowledge that he will give, at first it will be difficult to perceive. After all, he says: "Don't drink, don't smoke, get up early, don't cheat on your wife," and so on. Is it easy to just stop having fun and indulge your "ego" right away? And this needs to be stopped. And if your spiritual master does such things, think about it - have you come there?

He is not concerned with giving you wealth, women, improving your position in society; its concern is to give you the elements of a higher nature that vibrate in harmony with Heaven, and if you can acquire these elements, preserve them and even increase them, then in time you will feel that your thoughts, feelings and even your health improve. Next to a true Master you can only find blessings.

There is a certain chain “Student-Teacher-Student”, which, in principle, should not stop, since it implies the constant development of the personality, the Soul and, accordingly, the Creator.

• with his behavior and way of life serves as an example for others, showing how to live happily and harmoniously in any place (time, conditions), not forgetting about "serving" others,
• gives tools for development, but does not do all the work for the student,
• does not promise Enlightenment to the student, but shows how to follow the path of spiritual development,
• combines kindness, generosity and severity, showing them in accordance with the behavior of the student,
• teaches self-sufficiency
• does not interfere in the personal life of the student, does not encourage him to give up everything and change his whole life overnight,
• helps the student to understand how one can become independent of the physical body, teaches a harmonious life between Soul and Body,
• helps the student to find the Teacher within himself,
• does not praise himself and does not boast of his achievements,
• does not stop in his development, continuing to learn through others and his students.

It often happens that a person follows a false teaching or an imaginary Teacher. As a rule, this happens for educational purposes: to develop the skill of seeing the false behind any mask and understanding the need to keep a distance from such currents or people.

Now there are many different "gurus", "spiritual teachers" who just want money, fame, expensive cars, women... But these are not spiritual teachers, these are impostors. According to Vedic knowledge, such "teachers" will go to the lowest planets of this material world (hells).

The True Path of the Spiritual Master is equal to the Path of God!

How to determine if a true teacher?

There is one sure sign - if we are dealing with a spiritual teacher, just one look, one word, one walk with him is enough to make such changes in your life that you would never make just by ordinary communication with someone else .

The fact is that such knowledge, such power, which has a divine nature, comes from a spiritual teacher. This knowledge enters directly into the heart, into the spiritual mind of a person, and completely changes his entire destiny. A person feels happiness, inner freedom, lightness, insight, a sense of clarity and understanding of things - and he consciously begins to do what is needed. Also, a real spiritual teacher does not require anything in return, he does not want to take anything from the student or use him in any way - he simply accepts him. And the reason for that is his compassion.

A living teacher plays a huge role in a person's life. He is a carrier of information that is not in books. It revives in people words and phrases, truths and knowledge that have been written down and known for a long time.

A teacher is a spiritual and spiritual mentor of development. He is not just a companion on the road. The teacher is a guide to the nooks and crannies of consciousness. He becomes the keeper of knowledge.

The signs of your teacher depend on what kind of future life you want for yourself: for example, you do not want to burden yourself with a family, then you need a teacher who does not have a family and relationships. Be careful: if you choose a teacher without a family, and you have one, then there is a high probability that you will be left without a family. Whether you want it or not consciously, the teacher is your icon. You will strive to be like him. The same applies to happiness, from an unhappy, sad teacher, you will learn misfortune, from a rude teacher - rudeness.

The teacher must inspire: his actions, the results of working with other people, his devotion and constancy to himself, his fullness and his eyes glowing with depth. It often happens that the teacher and the student are somewhat similar in appearance. This means that your energies have common components.

Your teacher always takes care of your condition. He is more merciful to you than others. He is helping, even if you don't know it. But on the other hand, it can create conditions for testing your devotion, constancy and resource. And if the teacher sees that learning can harm you, he will definitely stop the process.

The task of the teacher is to strengthen your faith in yourself, in your abilities. It dispels your doubts by highlighting the qualities of your personality that will help in this. But he does not hide the qualities that hinder development. He speaks and acts when you are ready to. The teacher is able to show your best qualities, constancy and inspire you to new discoveries.

Another important sign of a teacher is that you feel kinship with him, cordiality, you want to share with this person, you can open your soul to him. And separation from him evokes a painful feeling.

From here you can see another point that this is your guru. You want to help him!

Having accepted a disciple, the guru already puts forward some requirements, the minimum that he must fulfill. It requires the student to follow some rules in nutrition, in relations with society, and so on. This is the idea - when a person, following this feeling of light and happiness emanating from a spiritual teacher, begins to do what he would not have done before for any price!) A student feels joy and happiness when he simply sees the teacher, when he talks to him, he perceives him as the savior of his fate, his life, and therefore he is ready to accept any instruction from him. A real spiritual master will not talk nonsense, will not give advice that can lead to the destruction of life, personality, health, and everything else.

Spiritual teachers give only those advices that will bring benefit. Well, if he gives initiation (initiation), then he generally takes the sins of the student upon himself, and the fate of the person changes. Here you already think hard before you sin further.) He purifies your existence as much as you are devoted to him. In general, these relations are very serious. So take your time with the spiritual master. God gives those mentors in the fate that you are supposed to now. And they will demand from you as much as you can do. Everything has its time.

1. There are many knowledgeable, wise men, philosophers, wise men, but only one teacher. Get a feel for the people you are targeting. Do their words and actions come from the heart. Or are they indicative of intelligence?
2. How simple is the teacher? Is it possible to communicate with him at any time? The teacher should be simple and accessible. After all, no one can throw you a lifeline when you scream into the void. The teacher always answers the student's questions.
3. Is this person an example for you? The teacher always sets an example, and does not occasionally do what he says. He gladly shares the wealth of his spiritual and material experience.
4. Is the teacher aware of his weakness? There are no perfect people, and a real teacher, knowing his weaknesses, seeks to heal them, and not to hide and protrude. Only victory over weaknesses gives true opportunities and strengths that shine in the eyes, are felt in gestures and voice, and are read on the face.
5. Being with a teacher next to you, your life is getting better. You realize that you can turn the mechanisms that hold you back.

The teacher is the air, he drives you in the back, spinning and carrying away dust and dirt. The teacher is fire. It illuminates your path, your dark sides, illuminating you inside. The teacher is the water that washes away the mistakes made during teaching. A teacher is a structure of information that has taste. Taste is the key to overcoming stagnation in life. If there is a taste, then learning will be joyful and simple, like life itself. Otherwise, any practice in tension turns into an ordinary ritual that makes no sense.

On the paths of churching, sooner or later the question will arise: how to find a spiritual mentor, confessor?

This is one of the most difficult questions of today. After reading many books, most of us naturally begin to look for a spiritual father. Especially since the entire patristic tradition speaks of the need for a spiritual leader. At the same time, we often hear from church people and from the priesthood that the time has come when there can be no spiritual fathers. Faith has become impoverished, and for this reason there is no need to try, no need to seek... “Your only mentor,” they say, “only patristic books can now be”... Do not rush to immediately judge whether this is so or not.

In order to avoid confusion, it is necessary to distinguish between such concepts as a priest-confessor, a spiritual mentor, a spiritual father, and an elder. There is a general church opinion that the eldership is now very impoverished. But even now there are spiritual people recognized by all, to whom believers resort for advice and consider them elders.

These, for example, are: Archimandrite John Krestyankin in the Pskov-Caves Monastery, Archimandrite Kirill in the Holy Trinity Lavra, monks in some other monasteries of our Church. Believers often resort to them in order to receive instructions, spiritual advice, and find the truth of life.

The problem of youth

There is another side to this phenomenon, which Metropolitan Anthony of Surozh spoke about repeatedly in his speeches. In our time, many young priests take on senile duties. Not fully realizing that there is a spiritual life, they undertake to answer some very serious and deep life questions of the parishioners. They even try to show them the path of life, moreover, to show them with some rigidity, presumptuously considering themselves proclaimers of the will of the Lord Himself. Such "young old age" poses a serious danger to the church-going person.

self-pleasing

At the same time, spiritual instruction is the most necessary phenomenon; one who enters church life cannot do without it. It is not easy to present the order of one's church life to the world, it is difficult and practically impossible to see oneself, therefore it is very necessary and very important to resort to a priest for advice, for instruction.

The question arises about the constancy of the appeal to mentors, i.e. Is it possible to go to different priests and receive instruction from them, or is it necessary to consult with only one. Here a purely psychological nuance arises: if you go to different priests, then the temptation involuntarily arises - to bring the most difficult questions to the most careless and weak priests, and bring insignificant questions to the most strict ones. As a result, a person will arrange his self-pleasing very conveniently, will go to two or three priests with the same question, and in the end will choose one of the three answers, thereby acquiring the skill to determine for himself what to do, perhaps sincerely. believing that he lives by obedience. But what is required in spiritual life is precisely the laying aside of oneself, one's own self-desires, which are often generated by self-indulgence. Such obedience is one of the most important means of church development, which, unfortunately, many cannot accept almost until death. St. Theophan the Recluse said that the bonds of the spirit, self-indulgence, as the deepest, can accompany a person until the very end of his life.

human weakness

The state of today's church people is so weak that not everyone will endure even the usual instruction of a priest. Today's believer will not be able to bear any instruction, because only spiritual strength, grace allows him to bear it for the sake of Christ, feeling and hearing in this a command that is in accordance with the Gospel, with the Gospel character of life. Most often, due to our spiritual weakness in our hearts, there is the power of pride, the power of selfishness, the power of vanity. And this power is hidden behind a flimsy, like plywood, shell, which is only touched, it immediately trembles all over, touch it harder, and it has already been pierced. And if they are pierced, then such a fountain will splash through this plywood that you will then bypass this person for a kilometer. Not only will you be afraid to give instructions, even to advise, when you will urgently ask, and then you will become with great caution. Church people today are so vulnerable that they have to be handled very carefully.

The Temptation of Self-Esteem

It's not just that many of us are very willful, very selfish, vulnerable, and overconfident, and it's not just that it's complicated. Today, the vast majority of churchgoing people have an education - secondary, and the majority have higher education. In many lives a measure of self-knowledge, self-sufficiency or a measure of self-confidence. Everyone thinks that he will understand everything himself, if not today, then tomorrow or the day after tomorrow, he reads books, thinks carefully, reflects and will definitely get to the truth. This self-confidence is so strong in today's intelligentsia that a person still allows himself to somehow listen to advice, especially since at the same time he is free to think for himself. But to perceive the word as an instruction, which means to do and act exactly as it is said, to put aside one’s will, one’s consciousness, one’s understanding – today’s person cannot afford this. And if at the same time the priest behaves a little stricter ... Usually, a strict priest, giving instructions, will not explain why this is so, but why that way ... When we begin to explain, we involve the consciousness of a person in execution, i.e. we persuade, convince a person and, as a result, we achieve his consent to the fact that it is useful for him to do so. And a person really accepts this as an instruction, but it turns out that this instruction is not accepted by the heart at all, and therefore has no serious spiritual significance. It is accepted by consciousness, which is convinced that the priest is really right, advises reasonably and sensibly, is benevolent... After such a conviction, the person was internally satisfied, he was convinced that he was not mistaken in the priest. And only after that he allows himself to accept the given word of the priest as an instruction. There is no obedience here, there is agreement with the reasonable word.

As you can see, in the depths of the human heart, in this case, all the same self-pleasing, self-sufficiency remains, a person does not go beyond them. Unfortunately, the majority of today's intelligentsia, who have been living the church life for 10-15 years, are in this state without even suspecting it. It is not surprising that for this reason confession is almost never confession, there is no repentance. A person confesses sins, but more from the consciousness, and not from the heart. It's like getting ready for confession, sticking bath sheets on yourself - while he was sculpting, they seemed to be holding on to the body, but while he stood in line to the priest, he had time to dry, and everything fell off, only one single one remained. . And a man stands, again trying to remember, or the paper that he wrote helps him out.

The priest advises him:

- You have two whole pages written, there are more than a hundred names of sins, and you start with what your heart mourns most of all, what your soul hurts about. Start with this, and then you will remember what was written.

The man slowly lowers his leaf to this and says:

- Father, I have nothing to say.

- Okay, then speak on a piece of paper.

But what is said "on a piece of paper" despite the fact that there is nothing to say from the heart, this is an obvious speaking from the consciousness. All the same intellectual state. Nothing more. All the same depth and lumps of self-pleasing, self-sufficiency, which really wants to become Orthodox and therefore, in its own consciousness, is now looking for methods and ways - how to become one? And having acquired all these methods, armed with methods, having even read all five volumes of the Philokalia and pulled out everything necessary for this, he, "armed to the teeth", now lives the church life! But in reality, this is precisely the very state about which the Lord said: "Many will say to Me: Lord, Lord! , 22-23). Unfortunately, this state is very characteristic of today's people, and it is very difficult to turn such a person to real repentance.

Demonic Intervention

In relations with the confessor, it is necessary to touch upon another point: demons who do not sleep greatly complicate the situation, and where a serious relationship between the child and the confessor really begins, this invisible evil flows. Where the relationship is cold, or lukewarm, or formal, there the demons are not particularly worried, but where serious instruction begins, suddenly, in one minute, a complete discord in all relations can occur. In a state of such temptation, a spiritual child cannot correctly realize what is happening. It is clear that one minute of discord cannot cross out the years of joint spiritual life, which means that it is a clear temptation that you just need to endure, and this will overcome it.

Prudence or simple prudence allows a person to recognize all these things, no matter how stuck he is. But when a person is hurt, not only his feelings are closed, but also his mind. Minute and even days of temptation cannot be trusted. It is impossible because of what is jammed, to break a long-term relationship. Endure to the end, and God's Providence will be revealed. He is always unexpectedly wise and profound.

Stage One: Priest - Confessor

At the first stage, a person comes to the priest simply as a confessor to whom he brings his sins. A person asks almost nothing from a priest; the books he reads are enough for him, and his self-understanding, according to which, in fact, he builds his life. He's used to living like this in the world.

Stage two: priest-mentor

At the next, second stage, a person begins to trust the priest more and more and therefore begins to listen to his advice. However, the child relates to the advice in a very arbitrary way. The advice may or may not be accepted. This means that the word of the priest, perceived as advice, still remains in the arbitrary address of the person himself. A man treats him the way he wants to. If he continues to go to this priest (and this is possible only in the case of gradually increasing trust in him and mutual, or perhaps one-sided attraction), then it is possible to reach the next stage. He begins to make sure that some of the advice he failed to follow was not just a human invention. Then, in the future, the circumstances showed that he was punished for not fulfilling them, which means that the will of God was behind them. He did not fulfill it and is now punished.

Such revelations, which he experiences during several years of going to the priest as a confessor, give reason to believe that the words of the priest must still be heeded. And gradually he begins to treat the priest as a mentor. The words of the priest at this stage of their relationship are perceived as instruction, and you will no longer be able to freely deal with instruction.

Instruction is a word that you accept to follow. This is no longer advice. If the instruction is accepted for fulfillment and, by fulfilling it, a person discovers, discovers that it helps him grow in spiritual life, then as a result he becomes more and more strengthened in his relationship with his spiritual mentor. The patristic books he has read show that the path that his spiritual mentor leads does not diverge from the Holy Fathers, the common unified spirit is preserved, and this suits him perfectly.

And, finally, to the extent that a Christian becomes convinced of the accuracy and correctness of the instructions, when he does them, it turns out well, and when not, it’s bad (this is how admonition comes), then his confidence is strengthened, and from some time he begins to treat the priest as a spiritual father. This is a completely new quality. A new right of the priest in relation to his child is being formed, but this right is not the autocracy of the priest, it is an authoritative right that the child gives to the shepherd as his spiritual father. What is a power right?

Let's look at an example. A child born in any family treats his parents as having power over him. Mom or dad can not only point him out, but also punish him. They can not only punish, but punish so severely that no one else has such a right ... And with all this, the child, experiencing the horror and tragedy of punishment, up to torture, nevertheless, having calmed down, will return to his parents. He will not run away from home and say, "I have no more father or mother." It is necessary to treat the child very strongly and very rudely, or not to love him at all, so that the child runs away from home. Now, however, this can be seen very often, but these are already cases of a clear lack of parental love. If the parent fulfills his duty with love, if the father and mother, by their parental authority, severely punish the child, he does not run away from them, and in a day - already, as if nothing had happened, he corrected himself, he does not do this anymore. The child knows that for a bad deed his mother or father will severely punish him.

When an adult develops such a degree of trust as his relationship with a priest deepens, in the end it is imprinted by his determination to entrust himself as a spiritual child to his spiritual father. From this time on, a new relationship begins with the same priest, but as with a spiritual father, i.e. who have the right to firmly and strictly turn their child away from his self-desire, self-pleasing, self-will and other things.

Stage Three: Priest - Spiritual Father

On the one hand, we see that in some situations the spiritual father can apply very harsh measures, because waywardness is so deeply rooted in our soul that it is sometimes very difficult to eradicate it. One can only wrest this willfulness out of us by making some drastic prohibitions, or a harsh instruction, or a harsh blessing to act one way and no other.

On the other hand, relations with the spiritual child take on the quietest character, when the priest does not insist on anything, but only gives advice, inadvertently says. And, nevertheless, both the advice and the word are perceived by the child in the very depths of his heart, his voluntary adherence to what was said by the spiritual father. The child obeys not because the spiritual father acted terribly, but because the child himself is devoted to his father with a willing will, and with a loving heart is open to his blessings, for in them he accepts the very will of God about himself.

Where can such priests or monks come from today who could immediately show their children the will of God? Indeed, a prudent confessor at the third stage of the relationship does not trust himself and tests the will of God. Bless the spiritual child to do so. The child will fulfill, but it didn’t work out. The man returns to the confessor: "You blessed, but things didn't go well." Once again, the circumstances are clarified, the spiritual father seeks the will of God again, asks in prayer, listens with humility, reasoning with the gift of prudence, or silently appears to God in prayer (each confessor does as he is given) and again blesses. Might be wrong again. Again, the child, having done everything as it was said, will return with a bad result, if he wants, with his reasoning, and again the confessor will think and pray. And together with him at the same time, the child will humble himself before the will of God and pray for it. And so on until it is found what the will of God is.

Thanks to these relationships, the spiritual child learns faith and trust, and the confessor gains the spiritual experience of mentoring. Whether he will come to the point where the will of God will be revealed to him from the first or from the second time, only God knows. He himself will remain in a sense of ignorance of the will of God due to his unworthiness, and he will lead the child in obedience to his ministry. How long can such a God-testing relationship last? For us, the current confessors and current children, perhaps for the rest of our lives. Therefore, it is not possible, probably, in our time, i.e. for many of us, the fourth stage, ie. seniority degree. Not every believer will find a spiritual mentor in a priest. Most are delayed at the first stage - they go to the confessor. Few, having reached the second degree, remain there for a long time. Soon they cool down and return to the first. Those who remain remain on it for years, not daring to pass to the third degree. To resort to the priest for advice, leaving the final decision to oneself, or to seek the priest's blessing on a matter already accepted by one's own will and determined by one's understanding how to do it - this is the state of many modern church people.

Yes, and the majority of priests do not seek the third degree, and even more so the fourth. Some - out of a sense of unworthiness, others - out of prudence, thirds - out of unwillingness to take on a lot of care, fourths - out of laziness, avoiding unnecessary work, fifths - out of lack of faith.

In the first five years after ordination, by the inspiring grace of God, by mistreating it, priests can be tempted by "young eldership." But this disease does not last long.

How long does it take from the first stage to the third? About five to ten years. The third stage can last until the end of life. It is hardly possible today to meet the relationship of a believer with his shepherd as the relationship of a spiritual child with a spiritual father.

Few of the experienced, mature priests dare to offer themselves as mentors at all. It happens that the priest does this if the child persistently asks for it, but agrees to this far from immediately. Inexperienced priests agree, but rarely anything good comes out of this, or purely superficial relationships develop that do not have the meaning of church life in their depths.

We see that already at the level of mentorship, a priest is required not only to hear the events of the priesthood, but also to have pedagogical wisdom. The combination of priestly and pedagogical wisdom provides a real opportunity to lead your child. This matter is very complicated.

CONTROL QUESTIONS.

• What are the stages of a relationship with a confessor?

Is it possible to struggle without spiritual guidance? The question is idle, because the answer to it is obvious: it is impossible. One cannot do without a mentor in such a complex area as the spiritual. But how do you find a spiritual leader? Is it necessary to actively and purposefully seek, to travel around the cloisters, to go from one priest to another?.. How do you understand that this particular priest is your confessor? And what should be its leadership? Explanations are given by the pastors of the Russian Church.

The Mystery of God's Care

Hegumen Luka (Stepanov):

– How to find a confessor? Didn't look, I don't know. As a 22-year-old me, a confessor was given by God at the time of my baptism. Therefore, I perceive its role in my life as a providential reality necessary for my salvation. Even if earthly marriages are “performed in Heaven,” then the acquisition of a confessor is all the more revealed from the mystery of God’s care for the soul that believes in Christ.

We have the example of Christ, we have the Gospel, we have the Tradition of the Church

– There is no one answer, it is deeply individual. How to find a confessor? I don’t know, God can send him unexpectedly, but it happens that you can look for him all your life and not be found or found. Everyone is different, but what is important for all Christians: no one canceled the Gospel, expressed in its difficult history, tradition, spiritual literature, worship. Are these minor things? A confessor is not a panacea and not a solution to all problems. Probably, 95% of Christians do not have confessors (not just confessing priests, but confessors). And the Kingdom of Heaven is closed to them? And Christ? Doesn't he give it? Therefore, if a confessor is sought in order to become the living Christ on earth, to obscure Him, there is no meaning in him, but only harm.

God will send you a spiritual guide - just don't miss it

It is difficult to find a spiritual leader. But it has been noticed by many people: scientists, theologians, and ascetics: if you ask God for a spiritual guide, He will send him to you. He will send it to you, just don't miss it. But if you ask for something absolutely incredible, great, holy, you can simply not wait for this. Vladyka Onufry said in one of his interviews: “I don't need a perspicacious leader, because I myself know all my sins. What is there more to see? And so everything is clear. I don't need a holy leader, why? what will it give me for salvation? I need a person who will understand me, who will not judge me, who will lend a shoulder. And who knows that it is impossible to demand incredible and amazing heights from a person, which we cannot reach in any way. He just can understand, feel and help in the most difficult moments.” If you ask for such a leader, about whom Vladyka Onufry spoke, then God will send him.

And without spiritual guidance, it is impossible to be saved at all. Without spiritual guidance, it is disastrous and deadly. You can never rely on yourself for anything. I always cite this comparison for modern people: spaceships and space stations fly without fail with the help and under the careful control of a ground control station, because in space, as everyone knows, astronauts even perceive humor differently than on Earth. And they may not understand and not see what is being done with their spacecraft. They are carefully, cautiously told from the Earth: “We must turn on such and such engines to align your orbit, raise it a little so that it does not decrease any more.” This means that after 10 minutes, the engines will turn on for one and a half, 25 or 30 seconds, and you do not twitch, do not be afraid of this. So that they realize this and really not be afraid.

Something similar is required for any person. We have a consciousness that does not firmly reflect reality. It is constantly changing. I even have such a term: “floating consciousness”. There is no constant and firm correspondence of our consciousness to reality. And here it is necessary. He should say: “Stop, stop, stop! Why? Where is this? What is it?" He must help - and help benevolently, with love.

No one is immune from mistakes and blunders. And even the greatest ascetics necessarily go to the confessor and confess.

A confessor is needed to tell us at the right moment: “Stop! Where are you going?"

I was very impressed when His Holiness Patriarch Pimen, for whom I was a subdeacon, once during a service, right before Communion, suddenly called Father Alexy Demin, a 90-year-old cleric of the Patriarchal Cathedral of the Epiphany, and said: “I must go to confession.” He went to the altar and confessed. And a simple rural priest, an ordinary one, took an altar cross, read a permissive prayer and blessed the head of His Holiness the Patriarch. Because the patriarch, like a good experienced monk, knows how scary a slight deviation is, and if you don’t slow down now, even in confession to a simple priest, the consequences can be horrifying and terrible.

That is why it is necessary to always confess, in all cases, even this is how His Holiness Patriarch Pimen confessed on the go, in order to be of a firm mind and firmly standing on the ground without any distractions and any sidetracks in building up his salvation.

Obedience is the principle of godlikeness

Archpriest Maxim Kozlov:

– The importance of spiritual guidance comes from a simple but very basic Christian principle - the principle. The Son was obedient to the Father even unto death, and death on the cross. The principle of obedience is not a discipline in the church, in order to make it easier for bishops and priests to manage the flock, but it is the principle of godlikeness, which we can and must implement in our lives. Of course, this is possible in a family in children in relation to parents, in younger relatives to elders, in spouses in relation to each other to one degree or another. But most naturally this can be realized through spiritual guidance in the Church: in a parish, in a monastery.

The measures and limits here can be very different, but the most important thing, in my opinion, is that the one you are looking for as a spiritual guide is a good person. Everything else can be very different, everything else is things that are difficult to measure: prayerfulness, many years of experience, and something else. Just a really good person. It does not mean - without mistakes, without sinful deviations, without any imperfections, but in the main, basically, in what the soul feels, - a good person. A good person can be obeyed.

If there is no tradition of spiritual succession, we are dealing with a remake

In order not to be deceived in the confessor, one must clearly know that he also has a confessor

- said: in recent times there will be no spiritual mentors - save yourself by books. This is the subjective reality of our days, but, by the grace of God, there are still people who have the skill of spiritual guidance.

But in order not to be deceived in the confessor, one must clearly make sure that he also has a confessor, and that confessor also has a confessor. Because if there is no this tradition of spiritual succession, then we are dealing with a remake. A remake is always bad, it is always an imitation of something. Therefore, it is very important that the continuity of spiritual guidance from one confessor to another be preserved. This, by the way, was the strength of Optina Hermitage, which, through Paisius Velichkovsky, revived the Athos tradition of succession from one elder to another. Unfortunately, now a lot of people lack this and some young elders who themselves were not under spiritual control become elders, and by communicating with such people, we risk passing off something that is actually cheap as something really valuable and significant. brand new and nothing more.

There will be no solidity in spiritual life without a confessor

Priest Valery Dukhanin:

– The one who found a confessor in time is a happy person. I have been very unlucky in this regard. Before I received sound spiritual guidance, I went through false guidance and suffered great mental damage. So I have something to compare.

The guidance of a confessor is an invaluable gift, which, perhaps, is not even immediately realized. Do we immediately appreciate the fact that we have parents? You understand the value of this only later. So it is with regard to the confessor.

Without a confessor, there will be no solidity in spiritual life. Is it possible to learn how to drive a car on your own, learn a foreign language without a teacher, or walk through an unfamiliar area without a guide? If this happens, it is only in exceptional cases. For all, the general rule is the need for leadership. In the most difficult situations of my life, more than once it was frankness before the confessor and his prayer and attention that saved me from troubles. Therefore, now I know for sure: if you want to save your soul, have a confessor.

For a person in general, it is important that someone hear him in troubles and sorrows, be able to give him the advice he needs. And, in fact, who could become an even more reliable support here, if not a clergyman, to whom God entrusted His grace to strengthen the faithful? Spirituality is very necessary. Otherwise, instead of a priest, Christians will rush to a psychologist and say that they benefited from him more than from the priest.

Of course, for the forgiveness of sin, it does not matter who confesses you. The Sacrament of Confession itself incinerates sins with pure repentance, because before the Holy Spirit our sins are like straw before a fire. Repentant, confessed sin disappears. But if through a sinful life and immersion in delusion, internal breakdowns occurred with the soul, then the wounds remain for a long time, they remind of themselves. That is why sometimes a confessor is needed, one who knows all your spiritual features, all life stumbling blocks, mistakes, weaknesses and injuries received and committed by your soul. A confessor is the one who finds the key to the problems of your soul and helps you get out of them by turning to God. A confessor helps you to find your personal path, on which the soul will open before the Lord and receive His grace.

How to find a spiritual father? First, you need to really ask the Lord about it. Secondly, try to notice to which of the priests your soul opens up in particular, whose instructions especially resolve your problems.

The confessor, first of all, discovers the inner disorder of the spiritual child

Often we go to confessors with some question, hoping to find an answer. At the same time, we naively think that, having received the resolution of the issue, we will immediately make our life easier. However, experienced confessors see that each of us suffers not from an unresolved issue, but from a whole range of spiritual problems that we may not even think about. Therefore, true spirituality consists not only in resolving momentary issues, but, first of all, in revealing in the spiritual child its main internal disorders, in solving problems that prevent the child, in fact, from being with God.

We often like those confessors who allow us to do what we ourselves want. It is painful to hear the bitter truth about one's way of life, it is scary to change oneself, and therefore we often look for a confessor to adjust to us, soften the demands of spiritual life and help, so to speak, to compromise our conscience with our laxity. This is very wrong. It is important to find a confessor who would help to slowly change ourselves, get rid of dilapidation, who would select the spiritual treatment that will be most effective against our main passions.

The confessor sees us from the side

Priest Alexander Satomsky:

Spiritual guidance is essential for a Christian. In any business starting from scratch, a person needs an assistant, a mentor. It is impossible to achieve results in a foreign language by doing self-study. It is impossible to get results in the gym without contacting a trainer. It is the same in spiritual life: you need someone who sees you from the outside, and also (God forbid) has certain skills in spiritual life, which he can teach not from books, but from experience.

A confessor is the person with whom the parishioner regularly confesses and with whom he consults on various issues of inner life. In order to meet such a person, you need to pray for such a meeting, attend services in several churches. Look at the congregations - what the people are like, how the priest serves and how he preaches. If you have a heart for someone, approach and arrange a meeting where you can ask questions and / or about confession. Thus, a contact can be made that will later grow into a serious relationship of spiritual growth for both the parishioner and the priest.

Real confessors do not break the spiritual and social life of their children

Deacon Vladimir Vasilik:

“First, you have to go through a good school of spiritual guidance yourself. This is both in and in the Church. Only those who have gone through the school of obedience, humility, controllability can rule and command. Someone who knows what it's like to be subordinate.

Not to be a spiritual leader, but to prepare yourself for the nourishment of a confessor.

Whoever knows what it is like to be a subordinate treats those who are subordinate, those who are flocked with mercy and compassion. When a person jumps into the bishopric who has not gone through a genuine theological school - neither a serious parish nor a monastic one, but who has rubbed himself around the bishop as a subdeacon for some time and, in fact, does not know the life of the flock, then nothing good can come of it. Except by the great mercy and grace of God. This is with regard to pastoral work in general and church administration.

As for spiritual guidance, namely the salvation of souls, this is a science, and a person himself should not take it upon himself.

We have nowhere to go, since confession before Communion is obligatory for us. Therefore, young, inexperienced priests are also appointed to confess. In Greece, the attitude towards confession is completely different: inexperienced people are not put to confession. Another thing is that not everyone, alas, confesses there. Young priests in Greece are forbidden from confession. They are sent for confession to experienced serious confessors. With us, this is unrealistic, unfeasible. And young priests, in my opinion, should be very careful. In a number of cases, if they are faced with a problem that is clearly insoluble for them, clearly beyond their spiritual experience, they must know to whom to send the confessor, if he shows sufficient will to do so. Here you need a clear understanding of your competence. This is first.

Secondly, one should not seek spiritual guidance, feel the desire to become a spiritual leader.

How do you find a spiritual guide? The Scripture says: “You will be a reverend with a saint… and you will be chosen with a chosen one, and you will be depraved with an obstinate one” (Ps. 17:26-27). It is necessary to look for such people who are both reverend, and chosen, and prayerful. It is not necessary that they be glorious, famous and informationally covered people. The main thing is that they should be people of grace, around whom love and peace reign, and the life of whose children is arranged for salvation.

What are the characteristics of true shepherds? – Lack of lust for power and at the same time real spiritual power

What are the characteristics of such shepherds? I will note this: the lack of lust for power and at the same time real spiritual power, because from the ill-conceived lust for power of confessors a lot of bad things happen in the life of the flock. Real confessors do not break the spiritual and social life of their children. They, like experienced gardeners, on the contrary, neatly straighten the crooked; like experienced doctors, they bandage the lame; awaken to life all living things that are in their child. They often say, like my late spiritual father Vasily Ermakov: "Think for yourself." They don’t become crutches, they don’t become substitutes, but, on the contrary, they try to make their children go on their own, most of their lives they thought, did, and decided for themselves. They do not trample on the God-given freedom of their children, but offer surprisingly delicate advice, as Father John (Krestyankin) did. I remember talking with him: he delicately advised. I received "in full" if I did not obey him, and after that I understood it, but even then he accepted me with all his love, despite my stubbornness, disobedience, stupidity, foolishness, pride. This is also an amazing feature of a real confessor - such patience and love.

Terrible misfortunes arise from lust for power and from the exaction of spiritual power, from spiritual tyranny. I knew one simply tragic case, connected with a very famous confessor - I will not name him. His child, a future priest, came to his reception with his bride, whom he loved. At the reception of this confessor, a girl was sitting on the couch. This future father asks the elder: “Father, bless me for marriage with such and such.” “No, she’s not yours, but yours, waiting for you,” and points to a completely unfamiliar girl sitting on the sofa. “That’s where you get married.” Clear?" He, in obedience to his confessor, broke off communion with the bride with whom everything had been agreed, and married the one whom the elder had advised. What happened? His wife loved him with all her heart, but he could not see her. When she came to his place of service, he literally went with her to the station in a few hours, bought her a return ticket and escorted her to the next station so that she would not jump out and return to him along the way.

So many tragedies arose from the power-hungry and unreasonable leadership of confessors!.. A true confessor should not trample on his child with power-hungry. Where necessary, he, of course, must intervene, and testify to the unrighteousness of his life, and instruct him firmly. But where there are no shameful and sinful things, where the child must and can act on his own, there a real confessor must give this "green light".

We must clearly distinguish between the problems of spiritual life and those related to our social and family responsibilities.

How to find a real confessor? We must pray for this. We must lead a regular church life and ask the Lord. Here it is not even necessary that the confessor be glorious, great, spiritual. It is enough that he was just a kind priest, conscientious about his spiritual duties, attentive and prayerful. If a person trusts him and prays to God that God reveals His will through him, then he will receive everything according to his request, he will receive everything that he needs for salvation.

Another thing is that we must clearly separate things related to our spiritual life, to our salvation - and on the other hand, to our social and family responsibilities. My late grandmother had a similar experience. At confession, the priest asked her: “Where do you work?” And she worked at the Baltic Defense Plant, she had no right to talk about her place of work. And she found in herself the courage and spiritual reason to say: “Father, forgive me, this does not apply to confession.” Reasoning and sobriety are needed both for the confessor himself and for his child.